Vindication via prostitutes!

I watch a show called Satisfaction. It is a Showtime Australia production about an upscale brothel in...I think Melbourne? The first and second seasons are on Netflix and I really enjoy it.

Showtime is one of those networks that says yes to nudity, while HBO "doesn't do that kinda shit". Just compare the series/shows they run and you'll no doubt find that the Showtime shows will always have more nudity.

And this being Showtime plus Australia means that nudity is taken to a very extreme everything-but-the-dangling-bits level. So it's fun.

Any who, the show is about the girls...women, who work at this high class brothel and in one episode the boyfriend of one of the girls cheats on her with another girl in the brothel (coke and booze may have been involved...not that that is an excuse) and it was quite shocking.

So the girl goes to her room mate (who is also an escort, but private and WAY more expensive) and asks if she should tell the girlfriend that she had slept with her boyfriend and the room mate responds with "Why would you do that? Do you hate her? Are you trying to destroy her?"

Thus bringing up something a wise man once said to me, which was that you never tell someone you've been cheating on them because though you may feel great to get it off your chest the person you were cheating on now feels like utter shit.

He doesn't like it when I quote him on that, but I felt it hilarious that his mantra was brought up on this show and thus his philosophy was vindicated by a prostitute!

He still hates it when I quote him on that.

The concept of parallel lines

We've all been here: one friend tells you something, usually very private or semi/mostly private. Being human you feel the need to share this info with someone.

Thus the issue: who to share it with. Obviously you made a pact with person A that the info will remain between you and them....but you need perspective and need/want to share it. But how?

You need to respect person A's wishes, but you need to pass along info. That whole deep seeded need and such.

So you turn to someone who doesn't know person A or...even better! Someone who knows person A, but never interacts with them. Thus creating the parallel pathway.

The parallel person knows what is going on . Knows who all the players involved are, but isn't involved and never will be.

This is a unique person. A favored confident. The one who you trust to not blow your spot when the time of calling calls.

These people may be spread out in your life, but in the end they keep your sanity in ridiculous situations and are there when you need perspective.

They rock. And in the end we love them so much for being there and being discrete while we do our things and stuff and they are there to secretly catch us and keep us going.

Morale of the story: secrets are meant to be kept...except when you have friends you trust who aren't involved. In which case, outside input+your own life experience=good advice for the friend who wanted the advice in the first place.

GPS FTW!!!

Today I went with a friend to return a rental car and then drive said friend to pick up his car from the shop. Sounds easy enough...and then I saved the day.

I figured he "knew" the way there, and by "knew" I of course mean I assumed he could get us there. I brought my GPS along so that after diving him to the auto-shop I could speed off home (and to yummy yummy Chinese take-out) and not have to worry about figuring out hoe to get home by myself.

Great plan until...

He had no idea how to get there. This I should have realized by the directions written on a piece of paper before he got in his car and I began to follow him, but I knew I could get home so I didn't really care which end of bumblefuck we ended up in.

Thus, after a few exits, some side streets we ended up in a parking lot and him coming to my window saying "Uhhhh, can I just give you the address and follow you and your GPS?"

We get there, drop off his rental, we leave for the auto shop to get his-

Him: "Holy shit dude!"

Me" "What's up?!"

Him: "I left my cell phone in the rental!"

Me: "Shit."

Him: "They close in 7 minutes."

Me: "Dude."

At this point I went from calm driver to (my favorite driving me) crazy-race-car driver. Some tire spinning and disregard for the posted speed limits later we were back to calming cruising to the auto shop...cell phone in hand.

And of course once we got there: "Can I follow you and your GPS home?"

Moral of the story: assume the best, prepare for the worst, and always bring the GPS!

Sickly studying scientific silicates

Many moons ago after being sick for 4 or 5 days and blowing yellow icky stuff out of my nose I decided to see the doc at the University health center. Having spent most of my Middle/High School years never getting colds and only getting sinus infections I was certain that some anti-biotics were soon to be handed over to yours truly.

Now, the health center folks here at University don't like giving anti-biotics and for good reason, anti-biotic resistant bugs are on the rise and they suck. So, they only give them out when they are 100%, proof positive, sure-to-the-max that the only thing between the guy in the black hood with the farm implement and life is anti-biotics.

So, having been under the weather for close to a week...no it was more like 7 or 8 days...having been sick for over a week I was confident that they would hand over the goods. I was also confident I could name the product they would give me, since I had had them all when I was younger.

So the doc sees me.

Inconclusive. No fever. Fuck that.

He comes back in with a little bag full of decongestants, antihistamines, and ibuprofen (well, none of that since I had enough to make a hippo not feel it's legs back in my room) and a list of how to cure just about anything.

Let me give you the short version: take drugs, drink lots water, sleep.

It worked then...it is sorta working now.

I picked a great time to get sick: a day before a date, a day before a weekend (that was negated by the fact that...), 3 days before a mid-term exam.

So far the only thing that really made feel good was the two Jameson and teas I had Friday afternoon. But hey, to each their own right?